Have you ever paused to think about why you feel the way you do around money? We interact with money based on our attitude towards it, which usually stems from how we observed our family dealing with money when we were growing up.
At SFP, we often draw alongside clients who used to try and hide financial issues from their families or simply avoid addressing the problems themselves. They did this in an attempt to protect their partners or children from fear or worry, but ignoring a problem rarely makes it disappear.
Uncertainty is uncomfortable, but it is essential to look at your situation realistically and intentionally seek solutions to your problems. Financial decisions affect the whole family, and as such, the whole family should be kept in the loop (at least partially) concerning goals and spending priorities.
By involving everyone in the decision-making process, you are providing guidance and healthy boundaries and expectations for similar situations in the future. And, when people are privy to the factors influencing a decision, they are more willing to accept the choices that follow.
As we’ve often said, finding consensus is a healthy foundation for effective family leadership and creates a shared commitment towards a collective future.
A financially resilient family is one that is aware of risk and how their decisions are affecting those around them. After all, the decisions you are making are creating a financial legacy. Not only in terms of wealth, but also in terms of the financial decision-making process that you are passing along.
There are three areas that you can consider when having these conversations with your family:
- How did your parents manage money and what was your childhood experience?
- Who relies on you right now? (this might be children, partner and parents)
- What are your future responsibilities? (education, travel, retirement etc)
All too often, a legacy is viewed only as a notion relating to physical wealth and to the past. This passive perspective of legacy fails to see it as a living concept connected by personal histories, family behaviours and financial patterns. It’s important to remember where we’ve come from while staying in touch with what’s happening and keeping an eye on where we are headed.
Your family legacy can only be built when all members agree about the basic principles that support their beliefs, attitudes and behaviours. Legacy encompasses everything that a family wants to preserve for the future – the history, values and knowledge, which are just as important as a family’s financial assets.
You don’t have to hide how you feel about money, and you don’t have to remain stuck in a frustrating cycle of trying to avoid talking about it openly. If you’d like ideas on how to start including your family more or changing the narrative of current family financial conversations, please feel free to reach out to one of our team members.